Sick and Tired of being Sick and Tired.

It has been a couple weeks since I’ve been able to keep food down.

It has been 2 bottles of Advil since my headaches got worse.

It has been 3 EKGs, 1 EchoCardiogram, 3 Blood Tests, 2 Gastrointestinal Specialists and 1 Chiropractor and I am still in the dark.

I am sick. And tired. Most of all, I am sick and tired of being sick and tired. I hate waking up feeling like I just laid down. I hate choosing my food based on how quickly it takes my stomach to reject it. I hate feeling like a 90 year old when I do my best to climb stairs. I hate it when lights are too bright, and driving at night feels like a frackin lobotomy. I hate the dizzy spells, the shakes, the cold sweats, the fatigue, the soreness, the shortness of breath, the coughing, the chest pains, and the fog. That dang, all encompassing, motivation burying fog.

I hate pretending I’m alright, because everyone else has a schedule to keep. 

It’s hard to have time for an actual answer to “how are you doing?”

Bah humbug. Something sarcastic. Witty insult. Blurp.

Today I started a 1 month cleanse. An actual, non-starvation cleanse. Not like a celery juice and you can smell chicken for a month cleanse. That’s called poverty. I mean a spend a lot of money on a specific list of organic fruits and veggies cleanse. I’ve been pretty much eating almost food for my entire life, with the exceptions of some meals cooked by health conscious others (you know who you are). So, 24 years later, my body has officially taken the stance of “THIS IS NOT FOOD”. Even with the fake produce at Wal Mart and the low-fat-but-turns-instantly-into-sugar whole grain bread from Savemart.

My body is a temple. A pretentious, vegan-esque, better then the industrial revolution temple.

Anyways, I’m starting to listen to it before it burns completely to the ground. Wish me luck, and if you have any advice, resources, or suggestions, I’ve been pretty voluntarily ignorant about food my whole life so, go for it. I’m ready to learn.